Most of you must have read (or heard) the saying, “Apologizing doesn’t always mean you’re wrong and the other person is right. It means you value your relationship more than you.” There are some lines, however, that must not be crossed and some apologies that are better left unsaid. So, before you go down on your knees, with tears on your cheeks, cracks in your heart and apologies in your eyes, read these words.
Most people don’t realize what a huge mistake they’re making (in becoming someone you’re not for someone else) before it is too late. And believe me, you needn’t worry about others. If they truly love you, they will accept you (and what’s more, love you) for what you are. That being said, it is completely okay if the enlightenment from within is driving you change.
Firstly, you should understand that “forgive and forget” is like a Nirvana that only some can achieve. So, if you end up apologizing to your girlfriend for a mistake that your friend is responsible for, you’ll know what to expect. Chances are, your every future action will be judged by a lens by your apparent previous mistake. So, in effect, by performing the duty of apologizing for someone else’s mistake, you’re accepting the responsibility of the mistake. And believe me, a mistake is a huge responsibility to handle.
As Brigitte Nicole says, “Never apologize for being sensitive or emotional. It’s a sign that you have a big heart, and that you aren’t afraid to let others see it. Showing emotions is a sign of strength.”
While it is extremely important to learn what you should and shouldn’t apologize for, know that you won’t always receive the apology you deserve. So, as Robert Brault says, “Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology that you never got.”
Written by Aneri Doshi
What makes my heart race? Books, Coffee and Rain
#1. Being Who You Are
You might have been told this a million times, but there is still a large number out there who spend their whole lives being something that they’re not, for someone who doesn’t even care. I read this quote a couple of days back and found that it makes complete sense. “You will always be too much of something for someone: too big, too loud, too soft, too edgy. If you round out your edges, you lose your edge. Apologize for mistakes. Apologize for unintentionally hurting someone- profusely. But don’t apologize for being who you are.”
#2. Something You’ve Not Done
People often tend to advocate apologizing in face of a conflict in order to salvage a relation and the masses tend to subscribe to the thought. And I’m not saying that it is wrong (but I’m not saying it is right, either). My beliefs don’t go along the same road. I feel that you shouldn’t apologize to someone for something that IS NOT your mistake, especially if a third party is at fault. This is very important in treasuring your relations with others.
#3. Being Emotional
The majority of the people tend to equate emotions to weakness. And they tend to be embarrassed about that singular decision that they took under the bout of emotions. I know a lot of people who keep apologizing for that one time when they cried if front of everyone. But, in contrast, emotions are what make us the strongest.
While it is extremely important to learn what you should and shouldn’t apologize for, know that you won’t always receive the apology you deserve. So, as Robert Brault says, “Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology that you never got.”
Written by Aneri Doshi
What makes my heart race? Books, Coffee and Rain