I am your average person, but I'm also fat. And that shouldn't change who I am but, of course, it does.
I was taught to be ashamed of my tummy rolls, to hide the stretch marks from the countless times I've lost pounds- and then put back on- with a fad diet, to not wear clothes that show more than an inch of skin, and eventually to avoid social contact just because I'd rather be by myself than face what my body is. Not because I was unattractive in my eyes, but because people would disapprove.I was called hippo, elephant, fatty, I was laughed at, yelled at, mocked by everyone, including my mother, who is, by definition, supposed to love me unconditionally.
I was poked and prodded with needles, from the countless blood tests and scans I've been subjected to, because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't drop a few. Only to find everything to be normal.
I have spent countless sleepless nights thinking what was wrong with me, feeling worthless, thinking nothing I did would ever get noticed because "I'm not easy on the eyes".
I feared to get on a weighing scale not because I was afraid of the number I would see, but because of the disapproving looks.
I am your average person. But I'm also skinny. And that shouldn't change who I am but, if course, it does.
I was taught to be ashamed of my ribcage jutting out from my sides, to not wear clothes that show too much skin and eventually to avoid people altogether just because I'd rather be alone than face what my body is. Not because I was unattractive in my eyes, but because people would disapprove.
I have been told to eat, put on some weight, that I was all bone, called malnourished, mocked for never gaining weight despite the fact that I eat food. Nobody believes me when I say I enjoy eating.
I've been poked and prodded with needles, from the countless blood tests and scans I've been subjected to, because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't keep the weight on.
I've been force-fed for as long as I can remember, weight gainer powders that don't even work, decorate my kitchen shelves.
I have spent countless sleepless nights thinking what was wrong with me, feeling worthless, thinking nothing I did would ever get noticed because "I'm not easy on the eyes".
I am you. You are me.
We've all had a struggle. If you're not making it better, you're making it worse.Remember that before you tell an overweight person that they've lost weight, or that you can see the bones on someone's arm.
Not to discourage them from dropping the extra pounds, or because their health and overall well-being isn't important, but because their outward appearance doesn't make them any less perfect.
Body positivity isn't a radical movement, it's what should be normal. It comes from within. Body positivity is for everyone, every body type. Your scars, stretch marks and bone lines are tiger stripes.
Every body is a bikini body, every body deserves to be accepted. Every body is beautiful.
Because, my dear, what really deserves to be seen is the mind you strove to be.
Written by Jyotsna Shiv Kumar
Eater of the cupcakes. Art nerd. Lov...er, reeeally liker of psychological horror novels. Your friendly neighborhood tumblr expert.